Membership
Form WPU/7 · Not available
Standings and requirements
The Association does not recruit. The Registry observes, assesses, and advances members between standings without notification. There is no fee, and there has never been a fee.
Provisional
Free
The Association does not charge for what it cannot enforce
Admitted on evidence that he
- Has begun to hesitate before large orders
- Has said “I don't have” at least once, though not convincingly
- Still pays for every date
- Reads the bill but does not question it
Standing: Under assessment
Full Member
StandardFree
Dues were proposed in 2020 and defeated unanimously
Admitted on evidence that he
- Can say “I don't have” while making eye contact
- Checks the bill line by line and has, on at least one occasion, been right
- Has never sent airtime unprompted
- Understands that a birthday is one day
Standing: In good standing
Life Member
Free
There is no fee. There has never been a fee.
Admitted on evidence that he
- Has declined a wedding committee to the chairperson's face
- Has left a group chat over a pledge and not returned
- Owns one pair of shoes he describes as “still fine”
- Has a savings account nobody knows about
Standing: Permanent
Exemptions
Three have been granted since 2019
An exemption suspends the operation of a notice in a single, named case for a period not exceeding one day. Applications are adjudicated by the Registrar of Wallets, whose identity is withheld for operational reasons and also because revealing it would result in invitations.
The Registrar is understood to regret two of the three.
An application must be accompanied by
- 01Fuel vouchers, unexpired
- 02One tray of eggs
- 03Two independent witnesses, unrelated to the applicant
- 04A signed statement that she truly wants “nothing big”
- 05Form WPU/7, completed in ink
Form WPU/7 is not available. Printing costs money.
How to join
You do not. There is nothing to join, because the Association is satire and has no members. If you have read Notice 001/2026 and felt personally addressed, the Council considers that sufficient.